I Hate To Be against Samus Aran (post-Fusion)

"I'm pretty sure it was Fred." The battle continued to be amusing.

"My suit is 90% damaged, and of my 14 tendrils, only six work. About my body damage, I'd rather not talk about it! DO YOU THINK I'M GOING TO ANSWER? 'Never, I'll chase you down till the end of time!!'?!", I-82B yelled greatly upset and heavily wounded.

"I'm emailing this to everybody I know!"

Samus grinned, happy about her victory, and let go of Xanny. "That's good. Now stay still and let me examine those wounds of yours..."

Agent I-82B at first showed to be relieved, but then raised an eyebrow.
"Just a moment: does this mean you are going to take my suit off?", he asked wih an hint ofshyness

"Well duh. It IS 90% damaged." She replied.

Agent I-82B heavily breathed as he noddded. "Okay, as you wish. Make it swift and painless!", he replied closing his eyes.

"Ha, welcome to my world." She said, and began to take off his suit, piece by piece. "Yea, that's going to have to get repaired. I would suggest finding a Chozo, but they will probably go nuts and change up your suit." She finished, his suit in a pile on the ground. "It wasn't that painful, now was it. No reason to be a big baby about it. You can't live in your suit 24/7 I'll have you know. I tried it for most of my life. Doesn't really work. Now let me know if this hurts." She began to softly move his elbow, wanting to see how badly she damaged it.

"I come really close to this, Miss Aran, as I have my suit on pratically always, with an exception of when I have a shower, which is once per mont.... !", Xanny proudly answered
. He disliked to have others to see him suitless, as he hated his true appearence: that pale skin with the red hair on the top, the lanky physique, those black eyes which looked like to have no isises. He close his eyes to avoid seeing himself reflected on the ices.
When Samus touched his eyebrow, he hissed in pain.

"Ew.. Once per month?" Samus asked, examining his shoulder. "Yep. Dislocated." With a sickening pop, she shoved the elbow back into place. "Maybe if you took more showers you wouldn't hate your appearance as much." She suggested, shrugging her shoulders. "But there's really nothing wrong with the way you look."

"You know, I know some pure organisms, and they all shower, like twice a day."

((This is a reference to Shasta... I don't know if you've noticed yet, but he's my self-insert. Or Thoth. I'm not quite sure. But anyway, I sort of have a slight OCD-type thing going on lately, and I need to shower at least once a day.))

Samus nodded. Even though she didn't know, he still had that look in his eyes that she had seen so many times before, even in her own. That of one who gone though something horrid. Something that they would never forget. "Its okay, you don't have to bring up a bad past. I do that often as well. Its hard, learning to shut those memories away to keep yourself from crossing the brink of insanity. But sometimes that fear builds up inside of you and you have to let it out."

"It's not that I fear them, I'm just.... embarassed! You see, Miss Aran, you can't blam yourself for your past: you were a little child... I was 21 and what happened is all MY fault, for I knew the consequences!", Xanny said opening bitterly his eyes

"Yea, but its nothing to be so embarrassed about. Stuff happens. There are a lot of things that I have done that I wish i could change." She replied.

Xanny took a deep breat and started talking fastly: "It all started when I was 21: my father called me from my room (a garage, where I was checking an airship engine....

"... And so I asked myself: 'Heck, why don't you send anyone to kick those mobsters' asses?'...."

"... I swear have never seen anyone reacting that bad because, instead of 13450 credit I could give him only 13449..."

".... Why is stomping on genitalia of your opponent in a no-rule fighting wrong?...."

".... In other words, it is so I became Agent I-82B: by not paying two checks! Now do you understand my embarassment"

((I suppose you all read his character history ))

Even though Xanny spoke quickly, Samus nodded and understood everything he said. When he finished, she sighed. "Yea, that Sylux for you. Not the best bounty hunter. Enemy of the Space Pirates and the Federation. Also hates me." She said, leaning against the ice and looking up. "That's us. People who really don't know the bright side of life. Some from fate, others from mistakes. I'm surprised you're not insane from what he did to you, but then again, with what I've seen, I shouldn't be talking. But we still continue to survive in a galaxy where misfits like us are cast out."

"So I was right! - he said, attempting to look more cheerful - We bounty hunters are all freak... but that's not a thing we should be embarassed about. Still, my MO is mostly based over betrayal, cheating and lying....! I even lost my 100% efficency....", he said.

He then out of blue said: "You are odd!"

"You guys can't look on the bright side more? Bummer. You should start singing about every phrase everybody says, which is extremely annoying, but cheerful. Like this:

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...

Don't you feel a lot better now?"

"That's Monty Python." Samus said to Thoth, laughing. "Life of Brian. Great movie."

"Indeed." Thoth turned off the camera, realizing that nothing more here was entertaining.

Xanny thought: With so much fourth wall breaking, I could easily arrest them!

He rolled on the icy floor and repeated to Samus: "You are strange!"

"Ah. You just noticed." Samus said. "Yea, most people think I'm this quiet and serious person. Not really... I have a lot of strange hobbies."

Xanny scoffed: "No, not this: the fact you let me live! Such an unsupportable person like me... How many people hate me? About one half of the one who idolize you! And you idolized by many people. Do you know how many colleague boast to have spent a night with you? Many, and when asked of the day, you always happened to be on another planet! Not that I needed verification, as I DO know lies!".

Agent I-82B let a chuckle escape and kept rolling on the icy floor.

((You didn't welcome my brother Xantospoc..))

"What did they say?" Samus said in surprise. "Why, I do believe I need to kill some people." She was a little irked by what people said about her. "I've never 'spend a night' with anyone, thatyouverymuch." She commented, a little embarrassed. "Seriously, barely anyone really knows me outside my suit!"

((Now I did!))

"Happy to have a confirm of this... at least I'm sure even the others rumors are false!", he replied